Top 5 software abominations of all time :)

Some software packages out there are so terrible, if they were human they would be tried for crimes against humanity. This list here is the most despised list of titles I could think of.

5. Java. Yes Java is in my list for most despised for a few reasons. As a program, Java is similar to a caged German Shepard and it gets very excited when its got work to do.  Java has a really loud mouth and likes you to know its doing something.  “Hi its Java over here, running something again, thanks for letting me out of the cage! ” As a framework its dog slow too. Java is the reason why you wait between clicking items on your cell phone. Java is the reason why that vending machine needs some time to compute your requirement. Java is proud to be everywhere. Cars, TV’s, Airplanes,  Not even Chuck Norris has visited as many places as Java has. Javas gay buddy is Open Office, and Java likes to make introductions at every opportunity.

4. Quick time and iTunes. One won’t install without the other, and there is nothing quick about Quick time. The program should not exist, there is no need for it. There are loads of other better media players. Quicktime is required to view .mov files because Apple says so! ITunes is the recommended way to connect to your iPod, and everyone has one of those!

3. Vista. The so-called WoW factor, is a great example of what can happen when a corporate goes off and dedicates a whole operating system to computing noobs, instead of asking seasoned users what they want! Vista came at a time when computing needed something fresh, and what Vista really did is confirm our suspicion that Microsoft have run out of ideas.

2. Internet Explorer. This is one of the most used applications of all time, if not the most! Its the very thorn in the side of the W3C set of standards. Its the reason why web developers can’t write “cool stuff”. Its the reason why HTML 5 will take another 10 years to hit the streets. Its perhaps the number one cause of problems and help desk support calls in any corporate.  Its the reason why web development projects cost 1/3 more than they should. And best of all the average man on the street that uses it, has no idea what a gremlin it is.

1. MOSS. Yes of course, good old Microsoft Office Sharepoint Server. Microsoft’s own personal trojan horse – Shhh, it’s a secret. Once you’ve adapted Sharepoint, your company might never be free of using it or Microsoft products. Sharepoint sucks because Mid level management have this idea that Sharepoint can solve every problem a corporate intranet can face. So they’re quick to pull the Sharepoint card like its some kind of joker. It sucks worse because Microsoft market it so well, that its hard not to think Sharepoint is a great product. But the reality is hard hitting, its a developers nightmare, no other program will test your skills and patience like Sharepoint, it can push you to the edge, and if you’re not careful, you and your team – you’re going over the falls 🙂